5 Tips To Solve Your Child’s Sleep Problems

It’s 2 am…The house is quiet…It’s been a long and exhausting day but you are finally in a deep sleep…Dreaming of some beautiful beach or relaxing wilderness…Only to be awakened by that familiar voice…”Mommy!”

Sound familiar?  We’ve all been there.  The call in the middle of the night.  For water, to use the bathroom, more hugs, bad dreams…It doesn’t matter why – it just matters that it’s happening – AGAIN.

And for many of us, it’s not the first, or last call, you are going to hear that night. In fact, this may just be the beginning of your child’s nightly needs for reassurance, cuddles, backrubs, etc.  And this may even be after you struggled to get your child to sleep in the first place.  Once this habit forms, it feels nearly impossible to break.  But there is help.

This nightly routine is just that – a routine or a habit.  The good news is that routines and habits can be changed.  It will take work and perseverance. But the rewards for you and your child far outweigh the work you will have to put into changing the routine.

We will teach you strategies and practical techniques to modify your routine so that you and your child get a full night of sleep.  Each tip will teach you a method that will lead to a healthy habit that you and your child can adopt.  With consistency, you can achieve a stress-free nighttime routine that both you and your child enjoy.

Structure Is Key

Four Ways To A Calmer Household

Structure

When we have new friends over, the most common comment we hear is about our son’s bedtime.  Regardless of the event, my son goes to bed at the same time.  Every night.  He says goodnight to everyone, we tuck him in, and then he goes to sleep.  It never fails that the next comment is, “That’s it?  He’s sleeping?”

Now this is not to say we don’t have our other challenges.  Because we do, believe me, we do.  But bedtime has always been fairly easy for us.  And I credit this to the structure and routine we established from day 1.

In the other part of my life, as a therapist, one of the most common themes I have observed is lack of structure in the home.  With chaotic schedules, long work hours, after-school activities, and social obligations, families find it difficult to maintain a routine.  However, this lack of routine and structure is harming our families.

Establishing and consistently maintaining structure within the home and family is one of the most difficult things to accomplish.  But it pays off.  Everyone benefits from structure.   Whether they admit it or not, kids crave structure and parents will reap the rewards that structure can bring to a home environment.

Ok, now, how do you do it?

  • Set a bedtime: No matter the age, a child or adolescent should have a set time when they are expected to settle down and get into bed.  This consistency allows their body to adjust to a set number of hours of sleep which will help with focus.
    • Bonus: If your child goes to bed at the same time each night, you have a guaranteed break or down time by yourself or with your significant other.
  • Establish dinner time: Family dinners are ideal as it give you time to connect and share your day.  But if your schedule does not allow for this, at minimum, establish a set time your child eats meals to prevent meltdowns due to hunger and help with appetite control.
  • Develop a plan for homework time: Establish expectations for when your child will complete their homework.  This will prevent conflicts over last minute homework needs and power struggles.
    • Does he or she get a break after school before beginning homework?  If so, how long?
    • If your child participates in sports, is homework completed before practice, after, before dinner, etc?
    • Does homework have to be completed before tv or video games?
  • Establish clear rules and expectations, along with rewards and consequences: The more you and your child understand what is expected, the less conflict you will likely experience.  There is less emotion when concrete household rules are communicated as well as the consequences to broken rules.

Start small. Choose a few things that you would like to add into your routine.  The more you involve your child in the conversation about structure, the more buy-in you will get.  Let them choose appropriate rewards that will help motivate them to follow the established rules.  But ultimately, you as the parent, will need to establish structure and be consistent in your follow through.  There will be setbacks and every routine needs flexibility, but the more you work at it, the better results you will see!

Is Your Child Homesick?

A Teen Life Coach on the College Homesick Blues

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You are entering college, a new world. You have left everything that is familiar to you behind, including, your family, friends, and school, community and your dog and cat. You may be an hour away by car or six hours away by plane. You are feeling out of sorts, lonely, too much time on your hands, awkward, etc…. Your roommates are not saying any of this out loud and neither are you.

You want to call home and tell your parents that you just made the biggest mistake of your life and they should get in the car immediately or send you a ticket to come home. However, as you look around at the upper classmen, they look like they are okay, have it all together, wow- they even have friends! You are determined to figure out what is going on with you. “Why am I so homesick?” you wonder.

The first thing I want you to know is that your feelings are 100% normal and that the majority of freshman are experiencing exactly the same thing that you are. I have put together for you a list of things you can do to feel better. This is not a recipe, with each ingredient dependent on the other, rather these are choices you can make to make this huge transition into college life and get rid of the homesick blues.

o Talk with your roommates about what you are feeling. Most likely they are feeling it, too.

o Stay in touch with your family and friends, but not in place of college activities.

o Write an email to a friend at another college and share your feelings, compare notes.

o Do something you enjoy like, exercise, art, writing, reading, and taking a walk. Don’t sit around your dorm room alone waiting for life to happen.

o Ask someone to go the cafeteria with you for a meal. No one wants to eat alone.

o Try to eat in moderation (watch the junk food), get enough sleep (invest in a good set of earplugs) and watch your intake of alcohol and drugs, which can all act as depressants. (In your effort to take a break from your depressive thoughts, using drugs can throw you into even a more depressed mood.)

o Give your self-time, don’t put yourself down. You are entering a new phase of your life.

Sometimes teens can’t get going. If you feel that you need an extra push, nudge, support, consider a free Teen Life Coaching session. In one 45-minute call you could develop a plan to help you on your way to ridding the College Homesick Blues.

Susan Epstein, an expert in child development, works with parents seeking satisfaction, balance and growth. Get a free teen life coach consult.

For more parenting help, visit Parenting Power

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Susan_Epstein

 

Postpartum Help

UNDERSTANDING POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION

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By: Cecil Ellis

The birth of a new baby is a life-changing experience. Many women experience anxiety and other troubling emotions immediately after they give birth, and this is perfectly normal. However, in some women, sadness, fear, anxiety persist to the point where they cannot function and cannot care for the new baby. If this is the case, the woman may be suffering from postpartum depression.

Not the Baby Blues

Experiencing “baby blues” after giving birth is a common experience. A woman may cry easily, feel anxious and irritable or have difficulty sleeping. It is even common for new mothers to have trouble making decisions and to wonder if they are capable of caring for a baby. It is when these feelings interfere with the ability to function and do not go away after a day or so that a diagnosis of postpartum depression may be appropriate.

The signs and symptoms of postpartum depression may include any of the following.

  • Sadness
  • Anxiety
  • Panic attacks
  • Feelings of anger
  • Feelings of guilt or extreme doubts about the ability to be a good mother
  • Loss of appetite
  • Being unable to care for the baby or oneself
  • Fatigue, lethargy, inability to manage everyday tasks
  • Excessive concerns about the baby’s health or safety
  • Loss of interest in the new baby/not wanting to hold the baby
  • Not wanting to be alone with the baby or fear of hurting the baby
  • Inability to experience pleasure
  • Thoughts of suicide or hurting oneself

Postpartum depression is more common in women with a history of clinical depression. It is also more likely to occur if a woman has other stressors at the same time like the recent lost of loved one, an unemployed spouse or a recent move to a place where she does not know many people.

Why Causes Postpartum Depression?

In women who are prone to depression, fluctuating hormones may, in part, explain why postpartum depression occurs. Levels of progesterone and estrogen drop sharply after delivery, and that may cause a woman who is very sensitive to shifting hormones to experience symptoms of depression. Combined with other factors, such as a history of depression or inadequate coping skills, postpartum depression is a real possibility.

Some new mothers feel a sense of loss after having a baby that can contribute to depression. They may feel as though they have lost their freedom, their youth or time with their partners. They may also find that myths about having the perfect baby or being the perfect mother are quickly shattered when the reality of caring for an infant sets in. It is important to recognize the signs of postpartum depression because, when recognized, it is a treatable condition.

How is Postpartum Depression Treated?

Treatment for postpartum depression is generally the same as treatment for any type of depression. As with any depression, an effective treatment plan depends on the individual and her particular set of symptoms. In some cases, medication is helpful, though a woman who is breastfeeding may not be able to take certain prescription drugs. Another approach is counseling, which can help a new mother cope with her feelings about motherhood and her ability to meet new demands on her time and energy. Rest, nutrition and exercise are also helpful in alleviating some of the symptoms that may be associated with postpartum depression. Social outlets, such as support groups for new mothers, can be useful as well.

You can get more ideas on how to treat postpartum depression in “End Your Depression.” The guide suggests many different ways to deal with and manage depression, no matter what the type or cause. 

End Your Depression

EXCERPT

This article describes postpartum depression and explains why it occurs in some women after they give birth. Postpartum depression is related to other types of depression, and some methods for treating the condition are presented as well.

 

 

Positive Parenting

Positive Child Discipline – Improve Your Kid’s Behavior

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Recommend ArticleYou know what you want. You want to improve your kid’s behavior. But you want positive child discipline, not something that involves punishment or hurtful reactions.

I can help. To start, let’s try to understand why your child misbehaves. The answer is simply because it works for him. Yes, your child has learned that by swearing or kicking or yelling, he gets his way. He has found the most effective way that works for him.

It’s not as strange as you might think. And it can apply from sharing his belongings to working with other kids in class. Let’s look at an example to see how this might come about.

Suppose another child at school is picking on your son. And even when he tries to walk away, the teasing continues. Well, maybe he decides on another tact and become aggressive with the other boy, who backs down. Whoa, your son sees that this new aggressive behavior had positive results.

And when this happens, your son considers behaving like this with his sister and maybe even you.If it works in these other situations, it only reinforces the behavior. Your son will have discovered that this solution works best for him. It’s the easiest path to getting what he wants.

So you’ve got to stop this behavior before it gets worse. The solution is to use consequences to curtail inappropriate behavior and reinforce positive ones.

Consequences work by letting your child know in advance what will happen when the negative behavior occurs. In effect, you need to set a cause and effect relationship in his head. When he behaves badly, something negative happens to him.

Let’s use an example to illustrate how consequences work. Let’s say that whenever your son and daughter argue, both of them must go to their room. And after a specific time, they must come out and apologize.

Now they both know beforehand what will happen if they argue. So if they do argue, they understand they must face the consequences of their actions.

When you come to see how consequences work, you can also see how punishment doesn’t have the desired effect. In fact, punishment can often make a situation worse and cause resentment or other negative actions. Many parents confuse punishment and consequences.

This confusion is discussed in a free video I am making available. It discusses the number one mistakes parent make when applying consequences. Check out my website ADD ADHD Advances. Knowing how to use consequences is the first step to applying positive child discipline. It makes a big difference when trying to improve your kid’s behavior.

Anthony Kane, MD is a physician and international lecturer who has been helping parents of children with ADHD and Oppositional Defiant Disorder online since 2003. Get help with Oppositional Defiant Disorder child behavior help with defiant teens ADHD treatment and ADHD. Check out our Free video that discusses the number one mistakes parent make when applying consequences.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Anthony_Kane,_MD

Ways to Reduce Social Anxiety

Relaxation Techniques For Coping With Social Anxiety

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Relaxation Techniques For Coping With Social Anxiety
By Sean W Cooper

If you are suffering from social anxiety, then you must know how awful it feels when you are feeling anxious. Not only does your mind race and you feel insecure and awful inside, but you also have physical symptoms outside. Everyone can see you as you sweat for no reason, shake uncontrollably, and blush at the worst possible moment.

In this article I’m going to show you how you can cope with these physical symptoms so people can’t see you are feeling anxious. You’ll be able to get some control over your physical symptoms of social anxiety. And since you will no longer have to worry about how you look to others, your actual anxiety will also go down significantly. The technique I’m going to teach you has to do with relaxation. Relaxation is the opposite of anxiety. By consciously choosing to make yourself more relaxed, you will be able to control your anxiety.

How does the technique work? There are two parts to it. The first part is learning how to become more relaxed by yourself in the comfort of your own home. The second part is using the technique in real life to help you become more relaxed when you most need it. Believe me, the relaxation technique I’m about to show you is a godsend when it comes time to face a social situation you are most afraid of.

So the first part of the technique is to sit or lay down somewhere where you are comfortable. It is best if you are by yourself so you feel as little anxiety as possible. Now go through your body and relax every part of it. Start at your head and move your way down to your feet, relaxing each muscle group as you pass it. First relax your forehead, let your jaw go loose, drop your shoulders. The idea is to let go of as much tension as you possibly can. If it helps, you can also try imagining a relaxing beach or stream in your head. Then just lay there for a few minutes and try to get the feel of how it feels like to be totally relaxed.

The second part is to then take this relaxed feeling into your daily life. Throughout the day, remember to relax your muscle groups individually. Go as relaxed and limp as you can get. The more relaxed you can make your body become, the more your anxiety will begin to go away.

Remember, step one is to practice becoming relaxed inside your home. Many socially anxious people are so tensed up all the time they do not really know how relaxation feels like. The second step is to become more relaxed as you are around people. The best time to use this technique is when you are feeling especially anxious.

If you want to learn more sure-fire techniques about coping with social anxiety, then click to check out my blog on overcoming social anxiety here.

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